Tuesday 19th February 2013.
By Jack Dandelion.
News Quiz: Question 1, Which South American president has 4 million followers on Twitter?
Q2, Who has put whom on the spot about fraud at Westland Helicopters?
Q3, Who is Michel Sapin?
Q4, How many computer users does India have?
Q5, What is Unit 61938?
Score card: 5 correct: British National Party newshound. 3 correct: internet news browser. 1 correct: NUJ reporter. 0 correct: the Guardian editor.
David Cameron has a plan to give £45billion to the British public just before the next election as a bribe incase we don't believe his lie about a referendum on the EU.
Of course this is not his money but is the cash Gordon Brown stole from the tax payer to support their bankster friends at the Royal Bank of Scotland.
The idea is he gives us shares in the bank but if we sell them then the original share value goes back to the government and we can only keep the profit over and above the original value.
What a nice little government scam: they steal our money to keep their friends in business, then they give our money back to us as bits of useless paper, then when we redeem our cash the government takes it back. What a nasty little confidence trick.
The UK and India are to fight cyber crime together. The sub continent is expected to have 300 million computer users by 2015 up from today's 135 million.
Most British data is now stored in India so it makes sense that the UK and India fight cyber crime together. For Cameron this seems like a major trade deal, but one rather gets the impression the Indians see it differently.
Oliver Pistorius, the athlete known as "Blade Runner" because of his artificial lower limbs, appears to have murdered his girlfriend in cold blood.
For whatever reason Reeva Steencamp, his lawyer cum model girlfriend had locked herself in the bathroom. Pistorius, the prosecution claim, got out of bed, put on his artificial legs, picked up a hand gun, removed the safety catch, walked 7 meters to the bathroom door and fired four rounds through it, which killed his lover.
What ever the outcome this story looks like it is going to run and run for ever. It has all the ingredients of a Hollywood murder mystery. Sadly the only person who could reveal the truth is dead. Steencamp's cremation takes place today.
The idiots running the asylum have come up with a great idea for inflating bank salaries, sorry that was supposed to read limiting banker's bonus payments.
It is called Basel III and limits bonuses to no more than what the banker gets in salary.
This means a banker gets say £100,000 a year in salary and no matter how well the bank performs that banker can not receive more than £100,000 bonus. Clearly our average EU bureaucrat has an IQ of around 70.
Watch bank salaries sky rocket. Basel III is not due to come into effect until January 2014.
Much fun will be had by all bankers.
Let's cut to the chase and outlaw fractional banking altogether, and then the bonus issue would be irrelevant.
Nestle, after last week declaring that unlike other processed food producers its products did not contain horse meat; the company has now withdrawn products from the shelves of Italian and Spanish retailers.
It is about time that companies like Nestle and Asda along with Tesco and Aldi were prosecuted for fraud. Passing off a sale as beef when it is not is a fraudulent activity.
David Cameron's support of big business and failure to fight for the rights of the ordinary customer makes him complicit in the fraud as well.
Fraud is fraud. It is quite simple. Fraudsters should be put in prison. All supermarket directors along with the British cabinet should be in prison for fraud.
China is responsible for hacking in to American computer systems apparently. So no surprise there. Mandiant, a shady US company that no one knows anything about, either who its directors are or who funds it, tells us a Chinese army Unit 61398 is responsible for the hacking.
The problem is that both these organisations are unverifiable consequently the impression is that the USA must be run by the same congenital idiots that run Europe (see Basel III above). Nice of them to tell us how stupid they are.
President Hugo Chavez flew back on Monday and was taken straight to the military hospital in Caracas. Has the President returned to take back the reins of power or perhaps hand them over to a successor?
Chavez has returned after a two month absence and he can hardly speak due to a tracheal tube to help with breathing, although he has taken to Twitter where he has a following of more than 4 million people who hang on his every tweet.
As a verbose orator Chavez has always got his quasi revolutionary anti American message across in no uncertain terms. But it is becoming clear that he cannot continue for much longer.
However improbable he might have appeared he has always been a mover and a shaker. Chavez has returned home to move and shake one last time before handing his baton on to a successor.
David Cameron has been put on the spot over corruption at Westlands in Yeovil by Manmohan Singh, the Indian prime minister. Just as the British people are sick to death of the corrupt British government so too it seems are the Indian government.
They have suspended delivery of an order after it came to light that an Italian director of Finmeccanica, who owns Westland, paid a bribe to get an order.
Whilst we in Britain are accustomed to blatant corruption in government and big business it appears the Indian government are not.
This must have come as a big surprise to duplicit Cameron who obviously believes everyone lives the same lie he does in all governments around the world.
The truth is finally out. The country is totally bankrupt according to Labour Minister Michel Sapin in a radio interview yesterday. After years of appalling mismanagement the French discover that there is nothing left in the piggy bank.
Hollande suggests that by cutting government expenditure by €60billion and raising an extra €20billion in taxes then everything will suddenly be alright.
But are the French people really that naive and stupid? Apparently so as it seems Francois Hollande has read the same book on economic theory as Osborne and Cameron.
Why not make it easy on yourself Francois and just outlaw fractional banking? Too easy? Too honest?